Can you imagine living your life where every word you spoke, you actually meant? I’m not sure that’s obtainable but I believe it’s worth working toward. We say so many things we don’t really mean from worry, fear, ego or just being offended. For me, it all stemmed from the insecurity of not believing that I was man enough.
Back when I started the process defining myself, I made a list of 10 things I believed a good man should do in order to have a clear target to aim at. I defined a good man as someone who knew their personal identity and core values, then was genuinely trying to live those values as a lifestyle. When a good man makes mistakes, he quickly asks for forgiveness and fixes the problem. I thought a good man was a man who would readily forgive and did not hold grudges or was quickly offended. One of the most important things I believed I needed to do as a good man was to BE POWERFUL. Here’s how I broke that down into a way I could live out in my life…
BE Powerful = Say what you mean, mean what you say, and take what you get.
Forgiveness and forgetting are not the same thing. A powerful man understands unforgiveness is poison that eats you up from the inside out. We can forgive but not forget, and not allow ourselves or the people we are supposed to protect to be walked on.
Being offended means you are not practiced and developed with your language. Regardless of how someone makes you feel, you control your response. Replace bad speech with better speech.
Holding grudges keeps us from being present. A defensive mindset will inhibit your ability to play offense, making an impact here in the present, and to do the work to be prepared for the future.
Being a powerful man means that I handle all of my responsibilities. It’s not a macho mindset that says “I don’t need any help.” We can all use help. I’m talking about not making excuses or waiting for someone to handle our responsibilities for us.
Finally, from the perspective of living as a “good man” (not ego driven or needing to be right) and from clearly defined roles and responsibilities, it is not my job to make sure that everybody feels good about everything I say. It’s not my job to make sure that everything I say lands well. Sometimes you just have to take what you get, if you’ve done your best.
Strive to BE a good man! BE POWERFUL!
Keep Coming Forward
Jimmy Hensel
